May 23, 2011

Hey everyone. Hope you all had a great weekend. We had a pretty productive one for the most part... got a lot of projects done which was great. However, Saturday I got hit really bad again with one of my "sad" spells.  Lately I have been struggling horribly with my job. Ever dealt with this before? I know I shouldn't complain because I truly am grateful to have something that helps pay my bills...but it is extremely depressing to work for a company that doesn't utilize one's skills when they really need to.  Side note: I wouldn't be writing this if I knew people from my company read my blog...I purposely have kept this separate from bosses and work so I can vent if I need to.  It drives me mentally crazy some days that I studied fashion at Parsons and yet they won't even have me design anything. I know the reasons why [which I will refrain from writing on here] and it has nothing to do with design but with a whole lot of egos I think.  My hope is to find a company to work for here in Salt Lake that is a real design team. That knows it's employee's worth and VALUES that. I feel that since working at DownEast it has slowly brought out something incredibly horrible in me which is back-bitting. I would never consider myself to be someone who gossips. However, lately I have been...and it has been a lot. I have sooo many issues w/ DownEast and with some of the employees there and I have found [as well as my husband Jesse] that I have been complaining [gossiping] nonstop about them.  As much I would love to justify my behavior and make excuses for the end of the day it is still gossip. It is sooo toxic and has mentally worn me out. If this is something any of you have ever struggled with or do struggle with, what are some things you do to refrain?  I know this will not suddenly go away today or tomorrow... but I have to get a hold on this and control it. :(  Sorry for the not so happy post.... but this is what I am currently dealing with and I need a lot of help right now.


On a happier more productive note: 

My father-in-law is marrying a very lovely lady this coming weekend. I am sooo sooo happy excited for this. I will be getting a wonderful mother in law who is so warm and kind. Something I have longed for for a very long time.  For their reception I am making some super easy paper lanterns that will be outside. Just in case some of you don't know how to make these...I wrote up some easy instructions. These ones I made for myself so I could show Trish [my soon to be mother-in-law] what I was talking about when I mentioned the idea.


Then I also finally got some mats made for our kitchen.  This was sooo quick and easy to do. With some leftover black house paint that we had lying around, I painted the plaid and herringbone on the duck cloth [aka canvas] with a rugged old paint brush so to make the designs as imperfect as possible. The only thing though with using house paint is that it does take a couple hours to dry, however I feel it is way more durable than using your regular fabric paint. 


Lastly,  what helped me [besides Jesse] get out of my mini depression this weekend was my discovery of a new favorite band: Foster the People! As usual I have played them over and over again.... I think I may have made Jesse crazy from this now. But creating and music is my therapy..... : / 


Jaime (soon to be) Steele said...

Thanks for the reminder on paper lanterns! I totally want to make some!!

ROXY MARJ said...

you're welcome Jaime! :)

valerie said...

roxy! i'm so sorry to hear that work is eating away at you like that. i too fall victim to the subtle nasties when i'm blue and it just makes me feel worse. i don't have any real advice, other than be kind to yourself! it doesn't feel good to say bad things about people, even if maybe they deserve it ;) but it feels even worse to dwell on little slip ups. and i think that sometimes might even lead to more. shrug it off! clean slate! you're just about one of the nicest people i know. that's a fact.

i hope that you find a work environment that is supportive and healthy and challenging to you.

love the diy tips! xo

ROXY MARJ said...

Thanks for your kind words Valerie! :) I am trying to shrug it off and start anew like you suggested.... :) thanks so much for your advice! xo

denise said...

can i move in?! i love your studio space and kitchen! :)

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